Extra! Extra! Read All About It!

I asked people all day if they had ever seen this show and no one had. 

Last Wednesday I woke up at 4am so I could be an extra in a movie called SAFE.  The day was well worth the lack of sleep.  Once I got dressed and made up, I put an extra outfit in my bag with some heels and a book, and started walking towards Chinatown.  The other times I got up at this time this year were to go to New York City and to help my friends shoot a movie.  I really like the city at this time.  It's really beautiful and still.  It feels like it's waiting patiently for the day to start.

Once I got to Club Shampoo, I made my way to the basement where many other Asians were waiting in two lines.  One line was to check-in.  The other was to be checked by wardrobe.  In line, I chatted with someone who was an extra as a part-time job.  She was nice enough but she liked to talk in a baby voice and I found this unsettling and strange.  After I checked-in, I got in the second line.  When the woman from wardrobe checked my outfit out she seemed displeased.  I wore the shortest dress I had which was a fitting floral print dress that I bought from the store that I now work at.  I bought it because it reminded me of the 60's.  I wore my seamed stockings with it.  I showed the wardrobe woman what else I had.  I refer to this other dress as my "Conan" dress because the first time I wore it, it was to see Conan O'Brien on his tour.  I love him (and his new show starts tonight.  He could be shooting it right now!)  The wardrobe woman didn't like my Conan dress either.  She flipped through some dresses on the rack, holding a few up to decide.  She handed me a silver sequined dress to try on.  I would never wear the dress on my own but I wasn't self-conscience in it either.  She liked it and asked me to take off my stockings.  I resisted the urge to turn around and go, "But they're seamed!  Like Marylin Monroe in Some Like It Hot!"  I always think of her when I put them on.

Before going upstairs, a large man with a booming voice explained what was happening scene we would be shooting.  We were all dancing and having a good time at a club in China when the cops and the main character bust in.  A shootout goes down and chaos ensues.  The guy seemed nice but at the same time intimidating.  He had a Papa Bear-like quality.  I would also compare him to John Goodman.  Soon, I decided I would ask him how to get a job behind the scenes.

 As we go upstairs, I feel a sense of plainness.  Where I grew, there were hardly any other Asians, even within my own family.  Around other Asians I feel left out because of my distance from my culture.  I also feel less special.  To be around 150 other Asians I feel out of place and just a part of the crowd all at once.  As we are split up into sections and as I am asked to take off my glasses, I wonder if our looks have anything to do with our segregation.  I doubt it, but once the thought crossed my mind, I decide that I am average-looking and am mostly unbothered by this.

We start to rehearse our panic scene.  I look around at all the equipment and crew naming things and crew members in my head to reassure myself that my film degree and special feature watching hasn't gone completely to waste.

After an hour or so of arranging and rehearsing, the director decided that we're ready to roll.  Soon, I hear an authoritative accented-voice behind me.  The man asks, "Can I have a really loud action please?"  We do the scene a few times.  There are fake guns and some screams.  Everyone seems to be having a good time.  The crew thanks us and sends us back downstairs for awhile where we fill out some paperwork so we can get paid.  While this is going on, I approach the John Goodman-like guy and ask about getting a job.  His name is David and I wasn't wrong about him seeming nice.  He is helpful and inviting and tells me he will introduce me to Liam later in the day.

Content with this step in the right direction, I sit with the other extras.  The one who talks like a baby, two girls my age, and two older woman who are with their teenage sons are all casually chatting.  The question of age comes up  At this question, "Baby" pouts and looks down, whining, "Won't tell!"  To this, one of the older women says, "It's no big deal.  Guess how old I am!"  We all guess in the 30's and she states, "I'm 50-years-old!  See?  No big deal!"
"How do you look so young?"  One of the girls asks.
"Jesus Christ," she flatly answers. 
I reached for my Gene Wilder book at this point.  As I started reading, this woman starts to ask our table if we know about the savior Jesus Christ.  I am holding my in front face like a shield.  Gene's strawberry blond Jew-fro served me well.

We break for lunch and I choose my food carefully because it's hard for me to tell what may use butter or other non-vegan things.  I got some salad, grilled veggies, and fruit.

Soon, we go back upstairs to run back and forth.  By this time, many people seem disenchanted with being an extra because by this time they've been talking downstairs for a good hour and a half and would prefer to do that.  For me, I am convinced that I am not good at talking to new people but I could be good at doing these jobs around if I created the chance for myself.  For the first time in a long time, I feel reassured that I went to school for the right thing.

Hours go by, we scatter, stand, and wait.  We are sent downstairs and up again a few more times.  I made an effort to pay attention to what the crew was doing and talk to them when possible.  I am introduced to Liam who tells me to talk to him at the end of the day.  Jason Statham makes a few more appearances as he is needed and the girls around me gushed quietly to one another.  I don't see it.  Statham's no David Bowie.

We are sent downstairs a little before 7 pm and soon we are told that we can go home.  Just a 13-hour shoot.

I got dressed out of my slutty dress and into my street clothes.  I didn't care for asking for a job in club-wear.  I walked upstairs and waited to the side until it looked like Liam could be bothered.  As I waited, Jason Statham walked by, stretching his face in a way that I have been imitating to my friends since.  Liam gave me his number and told me to text him the following morning about getting a PA (Production Assistant) job.  Mission Accomplished.      

Conan's back!